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Showing posts with label soul mate. Show all posts
Showing posts with label soul mate. Show all posts

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Final good by-Brenda Comnick -12/11/10


I feel my body floating, as the years grow dim. They all said that the pain would get less, so when will that be?
When will I feel like a person again?
Someone who can finally enjoy life and live it to it’s fullest.
When will I start to heal?
Every night I use to walk the halls in fear that this is not dream.
No I walk the halls knowing that it’s not.
My life will never be the same. A part of me will always be missing. My eyes will never have the gleam of happiness. I want to live again but can’t. The pain is to great. I have forgotten you voice, your smile, your laugh and the tenderness of your touch.
I want to reach out and hold you again in my arms. Hold your face in my hands and gently kiss the small of your neck.
I want to hear the laughs that we had together.
I want to be with others and not feel strange that I have no one that I love sitting with me.
You know when you left me that I would fall apart. That I would pull away and you know that it would be for a long while.
Why did you have to go?
Why did you have to die?
Why couldn’t it be me instead of you?
Why does it have to hurt so much?
For three years I have morn for you. Long to be with you.
For three years I forced myself to go and do things that I really didn’t want to.
For three years I sat and cried for you day and night.
I can’t stand the loneness anymore. I need to say good-by my love and really move on.
I will miss you forever and forever you will be my only true love.
2011 must be my year of coming out into the world again.
Good by.

This is dedicated to my one and only Soul mate

Brenda Gomnick Died 12/11/07 Rest in peace my love.

By
Herb A Krantz

Sunday, December 27, 2009

No happily every after



Once upon a time there was a young man who was happy go lucky. He lived life every day to the fullest. Then one day he met his love, dancing down the street. It didn't take long for them to fall madly in live and get married.

They both worked hard and played hard. He worked from early morning to late at night. They family had everything except their father-husband there with them. He was trying to make a living for them but as usual he didn't realize that they rather have him. He finally realized what his family wanted. They wanted him around more so he stepped down from his high paying position to a lesser position, a job to spend more time with his family. That position paid less and the family had to do with less. His wife didn't like that. She was use to not working and having anything she wanted.

After twenty years of marriage it finally caught up to them. The arguments when they were together became command place.

One day his daughter look up at him and asked," Why do you and mommy argue all the time, he answered, when we stop arguing it will be time to start worrying because then we won't care what happens to our family. As long as there was something to fight for the marriage would stay together he thought.

That day of reckoning came and after twenty years their family broke up. It was a very sad day for the kids but the parents knew it couldn't go on. That it was better that he left and maybe his wife and the kids would live a calmer life. As most families he became a weekend dad, but he called his kids every night. He wanted to let then know that he loved them very much.

He stay by himself working all day and most of the night in a business he started. He was getting very lonely and prayed to the God above that he would met someone that would totally love for what he was and no for what he can give her. For years he would go out with several different woman and have a meaningless relationships with them. He was never really happy and always was glad to be alone again.

Then one day he met this very charming lady. She had a glare in her eyes a smile in her voice. He knew that she was special when he met her but how special she really was, was a pleasant surprise. She was a unique person, someone who would make everyone who met her feel good to be in her presents. To be around her was to be in front of an angle that was here on earth to spread happiness and joy. Could it be that God had finally answered his prayers? She was way more than he had asked for. He found a meaningful relationship with her that grow into a love that was strong and every lasting. Everyone that met them both could see how very much in love they were. It was a love story that you read in a book or see in the movies. His family and hers fell in love with each other. It was like they were all made for each other. They married and lived very happily but only for a short time.

Once again his hart would be broken. His soul mate died suddenly and he was left along again to morn her death forever. There could be no one to take her place; she was tru
one of a kind. Once again God would take away the reason for living. When she was alive he had a purpose. Now there was nothing. What was sense of looking again, to fall in love, for it to be taken away? There will only be loneliness and despair there will be no happy every after for him.

Monday, September 14, 2009

How do I get over true love?



How do I get over true love?

As a person grows older it is always better to grow with someone who is near and dear to your hart, a soul mate. When that other half isn’t there your may never grow older at all. Not because you don’t want to but because your hart is broken.
A broken hart never mends as the song says. The memories of a true love, a soul mate will never be replaced.
It’s no fair that I have lost the only woman that I will truly love as my soul mate. The only woman that made me fell complete, made me feel like a man. Who appreciated me for who I really was and who I really am?
I waited most of my life to find you only to lose you again. There are many friends around me but I cannot get close to them as I did with you by my side.
How long is it going to take to find someone just to soften my hartack?
How long will it take to find some happiness again?
I have been told that it’s time to move on and rightly so.
I should, but how?
Every day I fine something that brings me to you.
Every night I cry myself to sleep, cause your not there beside me.
I look into woman’s eyes to seek out yours.
It will be two years Dec 11 and I still miss you just like it was yesterday, but I seek the friendship of someone else to fill the void.
I need to venture out but I miss you so.
Am I nuts or is this the way it is?
There are so many feelings that run deep inside me. A hole where feelings use to be.
I would love to share those feeling with another.
Am I ready?
I think so but I am afraid of losing you completely.
I need to feel whole again but I don’t know how.
How do I start over again after sharing a love like ours?
How do I open up to someone else and take the chance?
How do I give of myself without being afraid of giving to much?
What do I do to get started, I can’t forget you?
I need to move on. I know that, but how and who it the difficult part of growing without you.

You will be in my hart forever My Love, Brenda

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

I will be forever yours

I will be forever yours

This is the beginning of my life with out my loved one. A lonely road that I must walk without her by my side. I carry her memory with me where every I go. I cannot smile because what ever I do I wish she was here with me.
This year of loss was truly something I never thought would happen. We were supposed to live a long happy life together. Our love was a love many only dreamed of.
I will never see a love like this again. I will never know the feeling of being loved with someone’s body and soul.
We had something special that only a few people know.
Sometimes I laugh with a heavy hart for I always think of you. I miss your bright eyes and cheerfully smile.
The warmth of your hugs and voice that I will never hear again. There will be no one that will replace you. It will be a Loveless journey ahead of me for my hart will be yours and belong to no one else.
There maybe others but I can only love you the way I did. I can only give myself to you.
This year is almost coming to an end and I feel the same hurt as strong as I did in the beginning. Everyone had said it will get easier but I find it harder as time goes on. There are only few moments in my life as I spent them with another that I feel I can escape, but you will always be in my heart and the pain and emptiness will always be there forever.
I will be forever yours till the day I die.


Herb A Krantz

Dedicated to My soul mate Brenda Gomnick.

Sunday, October 26, 2008

If only

If only I could see you again and tell you how much I love you. Look you in your eyes and see the light of your soul.
If only I could hold you in my arms again and feel your body next to mine. I would hold you tight and never let you go.
If only I knew that you were leaving me I would have held on to you as you left this world.
If only I knew that you would die not I, I would of begged the lord above to take me instead.
If only I had on more chance to kiss on your neck. To make you laugh. To make you feel good about yourself.
If only I could see your smile and hear your voice once more.
If only we could go out and dance and be the couple that shows love on the dance floor. No matter where we went everyone know we were a couple deeply in love. Two lonely souls placed together by the lord above.
There are so many things I feel we have left undone.
I will never feel complete again no that you are gone.
If only I knew the joy I felt with you, I don’t know if I would of taken the chance because of the hurt I feel know.
One thing I do know I will never let myself be put in this place. The hurt is to great to go through again.
Rest in peace my one and only true love

Dedicated to Brenda G. Gomnick.


Herb A Krantz

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

My grief

My grief.

I wonder through the darkness with my eyes held shut. A mask covers my face, the path I walk I cannot see. My hart feels nothing.
There is no one to feel my grief, to share my lost. I am along with my tears. The hurt overcomes me at times, so much I cannot move. The lost of my love has taken the feeling of love from me. I don’t know if I could every offer it again.
Will I ever feel love again?
Will I ever be able to give love?
Is there happiness in my future?
Will I ever need others in my life?
I am to a point in my life that I have to make a design on how to guild it.
Life is so hard as is, but to get past a death of a person who has made such a difference in your life makes it harder.
She was a ray of sunshine whenever she entered a room.
She was a person that made people laugh.
She made everyone feel good about themselves.
She made me come alive.
She was a gift to all that knew her.
I feel it maybe time to continue on with whatever life I have left but I don’t know if I can. I think to myself I’m doing well but then I get hit with rage and sadness.
Is it time I move on?
Is it right to continue down that road without her?
I don’t know what lay’s ahead but I do know I can’t give what I did before. This hurt is to deep to ever go through it again.
I must welcome the dark and say good-by to the happiness I once knew.


Dedicated to Brenda G. Gomnick.


Herb A Krantz

Friday, October 17, 2008

To what every the future brings

To what every the future brings

I can share my love but I can’t give you me. My soul has been ripped from my body, there is more soul left to give. I will walk this earth for the rest of my life never being able to enjoy another’s love as I have with you my love.
I will never be able to commit to anyone but hopefully be able to share some joy and some laughter. Deep love will never be mine again. I am a damaged goods that can never be repaired.
No one could ever follow in my true love’s foot steeps. She has spoiled me. Her laughter
haunts my memory.
I am changing my life and lifestyle and trying to move on. My love you will always be a part of my life no matter witch direction it goes. I will love you with all my hart. You are a part of me that will live on till the day I die.
I have learned many things from you and hopefully I will be able to live as you did by influencing people and making them laugh at themselves and each other. Being a positive influence by making them happy.
In your memory I will become a better person and serve our family and friends with all the respect and gratitude they deserve.
I am headed into this journey without you but I can feel your hand in mine. Give me strength my dears love because it is time to let you go and move on to what every the future brings.

Dedicated to Brenda G Gomnick
Herb A Krantz

Monday, October 13, 2008

The Jewish New Year (Rosh Hashanah) 2008

The Jewish New Year (Rosh Hashanah) 2008

I have lost my identity and the meaning for living. As I look back at last year we were celebrating my rebirth from the dead. Not only was I not suppose to leave the hospital but I was not given much chance afterward. Brenda and all the family gave thanks to god for writing me in the book of life.
We never though that Brenda would not be included in the book of life with me. I’m here and she is gone. God played a bad joke on all that loved her and knew. He took the wrong person and know we are all left to suffer.
My life will never be the same. The fulfillment I felt in life with Brenda will never be again with anyone else. I am a shell of what I use to be. Brenda knew that this would happen. She told me two weeks before she died.
I don’t look forward to the years to come. My eyes can’t see pass today. I have no plan for the future just keep looking back at the passed. I have decided that I will never marry again; it would not be fair to hold that woman up to the height of Brenda’s love. Therefore I will walk the reminder of my life in memories of what I had and lost In Brenda’s death.



Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, fantastic Grandmother and one hell of a woman, you are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.
Help me keep Brenda’s name aliveBelow are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name. Thank you Herb A Krantz
Children's Hospital of Philadelphia
Chop Hospital Phila Pa.
http://www.chop.edu/consumer/index.jsp
St Jude
http://www.stjude.org/stjude/v/index.jspvgnextoid=f2bfab46cb118010VgnVCM1000000e2015acRCRD

Stem Cell Research
Michael J Fox
http://www.michaeljfox.org/
Christopher reeve http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.geIMLPOpGjF/b.899265/k.CC03/Home.htm

Sunday, October 5, 2008

The Jewish New Year (Rosh Hashanah) 2008

The Jewish New Year (Rosh Hashanah) 2008

I have lost my identity and the meaning for living. As I look back at last year we were celebrating my rebirth from the dead. Not only was I not suppose to leave the hospital but I was not given much chance afterward. Brenda and all the family gave thanks to god for writing me in the book of life.
We never though that Brenda would not be included in the book of life with me. I’m here and she is gone. God played a bad joke on all that loved her and knew. He took the wrong person and know we are all left to suffer.
My life will never be the same. The fulfillment I felt in life with Brenda will never be again with anyone else. I am a shell of what I use to be. Brenda knew that this would happen. She told me two weeks before she died.
I don’t look forward to the years to come. My eyes can’t see pass today. I have no plan for the future just keep looking back at the passed. I have decided that I will never marry again; it would not be fair to hold that woman up to the height of Brenda’s love. Therefore I will walk the reminder of my life in memories of what I had and lost In Brenda’s death.



Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, fantastic Grandmother and one hell of a woman, you are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.
Help me keep Brenda’s name aliveBelow are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name.

Thank you Herb A Krantz

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia
Chop Hospital Phila Pa.
http://www.chop.edu/consumer/index.jsp
St Jude
http://www.stjude.org/stjude/v/index.jspvgnextoid=f2bfab46cb118010VgnVCM1000000e2015acRCRD

Stem Cell Research
Michael J Fox
http://www.michaeljfox.org/
Christopher reeve http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.geIMLPOpGjF/b.899265/k.CC03/Home.htm

Sunday, August 17, 2008

The first Year Of Loss Of a loved one.doc

I have asked many people how you get through the first year of the loss of a loved one? The answer is the same from everyone I ask. You have to be strong and continue on with your life. I find that the most difficult thing I have ever faced and I can’t seem to get moving. My anxiety grows every week since Brenda died.
I know have to take medicine to sleep and I fight every day not to take medicine for my anxiety. I don’t want depend upon a pill to make me feel good or function every day. I have to fight it or it will control me. It’s bad enough that my depression holds me hostage. Will this ever end?
I can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, all I see is the dark. Thank God for the good friends and family Brenda left me with. Two friends in particular that will not let me sit for long.
I am now trying to get out and fight for my life again. I know it will never be the same or even close. I will never love again like I did with Brenda. I don’t know if I will ever love at all. I don’t want to be hurt again. The pain is to great.
I need to find the courage to face what is ahead of me.

Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, a woman of great worth to all and a fantastic Grandmother. You are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.

Rest in peace my bright eyes.

Help me keep Brenda’s name alive.

Below are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name.

Thank you Herb A Krantz

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia
Chop Hospital Phila Pa.
http://www.chop.edu/consumer/index.jsp

St Jude
http://www.stjude.org/stjude/v/index.jspvgnextoid=f2bfab46cb118010VgnVCM1000000e2015acRCRD

Stem Cell Research

Michael J Fox http://www.michaeljfox.org/

Christopher reeve http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.geIMLPOpGjF/b.899265/k.CC03/Home.htm

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Live Again

I triedall my life by doing the right thing for every one. My friends, family and quittances. Is would always be about them. They were important parts of my life. They matter deeply to me and still do. I always told Brenda if we treat our spouses like we treat friends they would be no devoice.
I lived my life this way and many times it would back fire however till now it never deterred my trust for others. I find myself trusting less and being along more.
Since Brenda died my world has been rocked in a way that I don’t know if I will every get over. For a while I had people in my life keeping me busy but now there lives are involved and I am alone again.
Year’s ago I was use to going places alone, I must get used to it again but taking that first steep is difficult. I was getting use to the female friend campaign on Friday and Saturday night dinners. It was great it was something to look forward to. A mistake that I will never let happen again
As I have been told, I must be a man a get through this and join the world of the living. How the hell do you get past it? How do you join the living after everything in your life has died?
I feel that I need a friend in my life that has gown through what I am going through. Some one who can truly feel my pain and teach me to live again

Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, a woman of great worth to all and a fantastic Grandmother. You are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.

Rest in peace my bright eyes.
Help me keep Brenda’s name alive
Below are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name.
Thank you Herb A Krantz

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia Chop Hospital Phila Pa. http://www.chop.edu/consumer/index.jsp
St Jude
http://www.stjude.org/stjude/v/index.jspvgnextoid=f2bfab46cb118010VgnVCM1000000e2015acRCRD

Stem Cell Research
Michael J Fox
http://www.michaeljfox.org/
Christopher reeve http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.geIMLPOpGjF/b.899265/k.CC03/Home.htm

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Why Didn't I Die ?

It’s been 34 weeks - 8 months since Brenda died and the pain has gotten stronger. The little happiness I have from my daughter, grandchildren, friends and family temporarily masks the torment that I go through every night. It was my grandchild’s birthday. Being there celebrating without Brenda was unbearable.
The question- why didn’t I die still runs through my head. Everyday I pry it will be the last so the pain will go away. When I am alone I find myself crying with such intensity that my whole body and soul hurts. As hard as I try I cannot sleep at night. Some days are 24 hours some are 20. The time I spend awake is always spent in sadness thinking of the lost of Brenda.
Everyday is wasted sleeping because I can’t sleep at night. Everything I have tried to do has failed. My life is not worth living. I feel that I have let everyone down especially Brenda; she would of expected more of me. I lay down on the bed and close my eyes and just for a moment I think I will fall asleep my mind starts running.
Is there any hope for me? I can’t live this way. Sometimes I feel like I am jumping out of my skin. I had a dream that I was laying next to Brenda in the grave. We were both on our backs and I was holding her hand. I hope that that dream will come true quickly. It will make others sad but it would put me out of my misery. That may be selfish but I don’t know how much more I can take. I need a job or something to do to keep my mind busy and my body tired.
Everyone tells me that I have to get pass it. How the hell do you get pass the loss of your soul mate? I have moments of happiness but they don’t last for long. I have even tried to go out with some one to feel like a couple again. There was no love involved just company but that hasn’t helped either. I am back in my house thinking to much. I tried to see Momma MIA In the movies but had to leave. It was the last play we saw in New York. My dear friend always puts things into order whether I want to or not. Thank good she is in my life.
I find everything I do walls keep on popping up.

Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, a woman of great worth to all and a fantastic Grandmother. You are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.

Rest in peace my bright eyes.
Help me keep Brenda’s name alive

Below are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name.

Thank you Herb A Krantz

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia
Chop Hospital Phila Pa.
http://www.chop.edu/consumer/index.jsp
St Jude http://www.stjude.org/stjude/v/index.jspvgnextoid=f2bfab46cb118010VgnVCM1000000e2015acRCRD

Stem Cell Research
Michael J Fox
http://www.michaeljfox.org/
Christopher reeve http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.geIMLPOpGjF/b.899265/k.CC03/Home.htm

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

The End ( Brenda Gomnick)

The finial day of Brenda is almost here. We will all gather to said good-bye. It will be the last time the majority of her friends will every see her again and her memory will fade as the years go on.
Even though they truly loved her and will miss her, they will never think about her again until they hear or see something to remind them.
Brenda’s memory will live on strong in my hart and soul. I will never forget her for every day I will think about her and how rich she made my life. She for filled everything that I was looking for. My life became really happy for the first time. I was just living a mere existence till Brenda came into my life. I lived a full life, happy and content with Brenda in it. Now I must live with out her. That’s going to be a rough thing to do. I don’t know if I am up to it. Brenda has spoiled me with her love. No one could every equal it. The happiness that I had may never come back again.
What the future will bring I am afraid to face without her. The unknown is scary to face especially after finding true love. Will I every be happy again? Is love in my future? These are things I am afraid to find out. I just can’t imagine life without Brenda even though it has been over six months.
I will need my friends and family around me for a long time to come. This tragedy in my life I may never over come, without the help of my Friends and family to make it easier.
I close my eyes every night in hopes that I will see Brenda again. She never appears. I just want to say goodbye and tell her that I love her. After that I can let her go. Until then I can never truly move on.

Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, a woman of great worth to all and a fantastic Grandmother. You are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.

Rest in peace my bright eyes.

Help me keep Brenda’s name aliveBelow are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name.

Thank you Herb A Krantz

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia

Chop Hospital Phila Pa.

http://www.chop.edu/consumer/index.jsp

St Jude http://www.stjude.org/stjude/v/index.jspvgnextoid=f2bfab46cb118010VgnVCM1000000e2015acRCRD

Stem Cell Research

Michael J Fox http://www.michaeljfox.org/

Christopher reeve http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.geIMLPOpGjF/b.899265/k.CC03/Home.htm

Monday, June 9, 2008

Finial Goodbye to Brenda Gomnick

My life is going on but I feel like Brenda’s is final coming to its finality. Once the monument is in place and all her friends and family say goodbye that’s it.
That day-that week will be a roughest week for me. It will be a time in my life that I will feel my loneliness the most. I will never forget her. My love for her will grow even in her demise. She was and always will be my one and only true love.
I know that I must move on but Brenda will be in my hart and soul and I will love her till the day I die.
Even though I can’t hold her or hear her laugh any longer I will hold my memories of Brenda very close to my hart. She will be a part of me wherever my journey leads.
This is a journey I thought I would never have to take alone. I thought that we would both live to a ripe old age or that I would go first.
Brenda was my support my partner in life and love. We lived for each other, now there is no one to live for. I have my friends and family along with my grandchildren but it’s not the same as having Brenda. She was the light in my life. The reason for me living. I will remember her child like audited on life. The way things came out of her mouth that made everyone laugh.
When Brenda was around no one sat with a long face. She would have you feeling good about being around her. Brenda was magical in every way.
Brenda was an angle who walked the earth we us for a moment in time, now I will have to let her go. I thank you for the time you have given me to enjoy you.

Until we meet again my angel.

Rest in peace my bright eyes.

This will be my last article about Brenda and myself.

Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, a woman of great worth to all and a fantastic Grandmother. You are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.

Help me keep Brenda’s name alive.
Below are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name.

Thank you Herb A Krantz

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia
Chop Hospital Phila Pa.
http://www.chop.edu/consumer/index.jsp

St Jude
http://www.stjude.org/stjude/v/index.jspvgnextoid=f2bfab46cb118010VgnVCM1000000e2015acRCRD

Stem Cell Research

Michael J Fox
http://www.michaeljfox.org/

Christopher reeve http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.geIMLPOpGjF/b.899265/k.CC03/Home.htm

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Second toughest week

This was the second toughest week I have faced since Brenda’s death. It was our sixth anniversary and only I was here to celebrate it. Luckily I face that day with a loved on by my side. The rest of the week was hard especially at night.
I am going away this weekend to get away from here for two days. I want to clear my head for too much is happening and in a few more weeks I will face the most difficult day since Brenda passed away, her unveiling. I can never put her death behind me but I feel I have to move on. If not know maybe never.
Brenda will be in my hart forever and no one will ever replace her. She was and always will be a very special person to everyone and me who knew her. Every night I pine for her as tears fall down my face. These tears will fall till the day I die. Our love for each other will never be duplicated. We had a true love affair. A deep love that was still growing. I have lost my hart, soul and happiness, no one will replace that.
I must face the rest of my life without Brenda all I have is her memories. That’s not enough for me, I would really like to join her but that’s not going to be. So step-by-step I take trying to start over again. Hopefully I do it right.
Even though I feel that I am getting stronger I still need the love and support of my family and friends. I love and thank you all but please don’t forget me.

Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, a woman of great worth to all and a fantastic Grandmother. You are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.

Rest in peace my bright eyes.

Help me keep Brenda’s name alive.
Below are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name.

Thank you Herb A Krantz

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia
Chop Hospital Phila Pa.
http://www.chop.edu/consumer/index.jsp

St Jude
http://www.stjude.org/stjude/v/index.jspvgnextoid=f2bfab46cb118010VgnVCM1000000e2015acRCRD

Stem Cell Research

Michael J Fox
http://www.michaeljfox.org/
Christopher reeve http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.geIMLPOpGjF/b.899265/k.CC03/Home.htm

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

My past present and future





Edvard Munch was a German painter famous for his painting The Scream. It was of a person standing on a bridge looking at the sky. The shy was black with Streams of colors dropping from it. It looked like the stars and sky was exploding. The person standing there had both hands on each side of the face covering the ears and the mouth was open in a scream position.

I feel that my life is like that painting except behind and in front of me the ground has a creator in it. Behind me is my pass. Back there is my life with Brenda. A life that I don’t want to let go of but have no chose since she has past away. They best years of my life. I wish was on voyager (Star track) so I could go back in time. I will never be that happy again. No one will be able to take Brenda’s place. The sad part is I know that I have to move on. What’s in front of me is fear of the unknown?

My future a place I must go. I must jump over to the other side but I can’t. As I stand there with my hands on my face my pass grows further away and my future is starting to break away also. I am standing on an Island all alone. If I don’t jump over I will lose all that I love. My family and friends. Brenda once said if she died that I would stay home and never go out. I would become a lonely old man. She’ was right, I really don’t want to go out. If it wasn’t for her friends calling me and asking me to go out that’s exactly what I would be doing. Every night I would stay in and cry. I have been doing that for almost five months. It gives me a twisted comfort in a way. Maybe because I don’t wont anyone to see the real pain I am going through. I must close my eyes and jump but before I do I must visit your grave. Will I land on my feet, I hope so.

Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, a woman of great worth to all and a fantastic Grandmother. You are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.

Rest in peace my bright eyes.
Help me keep Brenda’s name aliveBelow are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name. Thank you

Herb A Krantz


Children's Hospital of Philadelphia


Chop Hospital Phila Pa.


St Jude



Stem Cell Research



Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Brenda you will live forever


I feel like my life is nothing but bad movie with a sad ending. You know the kind that gives you something to hope for but take’s it away in the end. A movie that teases you with hope when there really is none.
All my life I had good things happen to me just to lose them. I said I would never let that happen to me again. Then I met Brenda and forgot the promise I made to myself. Maybe if I never meet her she would still be alive. It’s been five months and the hurt, loneliness and the anger is still there. As a matter of fact it grows ever day, stronger and stronger.
I look back upon my life, the three happiest times were, when my child was born, the day my daughter and I finally got back together and the day I married Brenda.
Everyday with Brenda in my life was a celebration of life itself. Now there is no life, no joy, no happiness and no celebration. Everyone hangs his or her heads in shock. A woman with the gift to make people smile and laugh. A person who makes everyone fell great about himself or herself. The world has lost a truly unique person. The mold was broken when she was born. Brenda you are gone from sight but never from mind.
I will live my life just to praise your name and memory. To my dieing day I will try and keep Brenda’s name alive, not only to her friends and family but to all on the net who read my articles.


Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother, a woman of great stature, fantastic Grandmother. You are greatly missed already.
Rest in peace my bright eyes.

Help me keep Brenda’s name alive. Below are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name. Thank you

Herb A Krantz

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia





Stem Cell Research

Michael J Fox


Thursday, April 3, 2008

Every Day gets harder



Her clothing hangs in my closet. Just a few pieces, the dress she wore at our wedding along with her shoes. A dress she wore at the last wedding we attended together. The wedding was in October she died in December. It was a dress I helped her pick out and a few other articles that she wore on our last cruise in November. Little did we know that it would be the last thing we do together.

Now I sit remembering the good old days but every memory hurts and they all come with tears. All new memories get tied to Brenda. What ever I do she should will be a part of. When I go out with two other couples She should be there. I feel that I am the odd man, the fifth chair.

We could all be talking and joking but I always seem to bring everyone down by talking about Brenda and how I miss her. I try not to but it seems to always end that way.
Brenda would have everyone laughing. We were George burns and Gracie Adams. I miss her laughter and her humor but most of all I miss her love. It was tender along with being intense. I always looked forward in getting in bed with her now I can’t go into the room to sleep.

Every day gets harder to cope with the loss of Brenda but in her death I have learned that she was deeper that I knew. She would give advise to our daughter on raising her children. The reason it’s funny is that Brenda had no children of her own but our daughter told me that she was right on. She help out a lot of people in many ways. What hurts me the most is that our grandchildren will not have Brenda’s wisdom to learn from. She loved them with all her hart and soul and I hope they don’t forget her. Brenda was truly one of a kind.
It was my mother’s birthday and Brenda was not there to make us laugh. All though we all together we all felt Brenda missing absence. I couldn’t be happy for my Mother because the hurt was to great. I feel that it was selfish of me but I just can’t pretend. Brenda is gone and my life will never be the same.


Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother , fantastic Grandmother and one hell of a woman you are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.


Help me keep Brenda’s name alive
Below are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name.

Thank you

Herb A Krantz


Children's Hospital of Philadelphia

Chop Hospital Phila Pa.


St Jude



Stem Cell Research


Michael J Fox


Wednesday, April 2, 2008

If Only?


I walk the nights from room to room. As I walk out of the room that I sleep in, (her old office), I found a card on a shelf. It read –
I love you in so many ways and for so many reasons…because you know me and understand me like no one else ever could… because you believe in my dreams and care about my feelings…because you make me laugh so hard and smile so often…because you have a way of bringing out the very best in me.
Herb
I love you
In so many ways, and for so many reason, but mostly because you’re my very best friend.

It was signed
I’ll miss you!
I love you
Love me

I don’t remember when she gave me this. Maybe she left it for me that day she went in for that minor surgery. Maybe she knew that she was going to die. She told my sister that she would see at her funeral Friday. She was buried on Friday a week later. I would of never of let her go. If only I would of listen maybe she would be alive today.
I miss you Babe, you were and will always be my soul. I will spend the rest of my life creating a fund to keep you name alive not just for the people who know you but also for everyone. You are a person that should be an example to the world.

Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother and fantastic Grandmother you are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.
Help me keep Brenda’s name alive.
Below are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name.

Thank you Herb A Krantz
Children's Hospital of Philadelphia
Chop Hospital Phila Pa.
http://www.chop.edu/consumer/index.jsp
St Jude
http://www.stjude.org/stjude/v/index.jspvgnextoid=f2bfab46cb118010VgnVCM1000000e2015acRCRD
Stem Cell Research

Michael J Fox
http://www.michaeljfox.org/
Christopher reeve http://www.christopherreeve.org/site/c.geIMLPOpGjF/b.899265/k.CC03/Home.htm

Monday, March 31, 2008

Tears fall so easily (I miss you my Love)


I thought that writing about my beloved wife Brenda would help me get over her death.
It hasn’t and never will.
With my eyes open I see her face as she took her last breath. I remember looking at her as her color turned from flesh to yellow. I could see her spirit leave her body.
I knew seven days before they pronounced her death that she would not come back. She had closed her bright eyes for the last time 12/11/07 not 12/19/07.
As I drove her to her death I told her that she would be fine. She come out of her minor operation just fine but it still was the last time she would make people laugh.
The last time I would kiss her goodbye.
The last time I would see her eyes open.
It’s now three months later and the pain is growing day by day. The sleepless night are going into weary days. I have many friends and relatives around me. I talk with them and tell them my feelings but nothing seems to help. The pain and loss is to great. There will be no other like Brenda for the world or me. She was truly a work of art, my dream come true. She was a big part of many persons life and what I lived for.
I have a hole where there use to be hart.
Tears fall so easily. I could be out, sitting home or driving and they start.
My hands shake like I never before. I try to go out and be happy with whom I am with but my thoughts always go to Brenda.
I love my Daughter and grandkids but without Brenda nothing brings me joy. Everyday is the same, day after day.
I try to go back to work but I can’t. I just don’t have the drive I had before. So I look for something different to do but that’s no working so well. I feel that my life is on hold and will never go anywhere.
I miss you Brenda so much that I will never move on.

Brenda G Gomnick wife, mother and fantastic Grandmother you are greatly missed already and your memory will live on forever.
Help me keep Brenda’s name aliveBelow are links that you can donate funds in Brenda's name. Thank you Herb A Krantz

Children's Hospital of Philadelphia


St Jude



Stem Cell Research

Michael J Fox